Want better results at work and in life? Choose to own where you are.

Do you ever feel stuck in a victim mindset? Does it hold you back from taking ownership of your life? Todd Musselman, a speaker I heard at Vistage, shared a powerful message about the vital choice between a victim or ownership mindset. I shared it with my team and I want to share it with you, because Todd's message has the potential to change your life. This blog post will share actionable tools and resources to help you make the shift from victim to owner. This is a message that doesn’t just apply to a CEO; it applies to every person on the planet. 

Are you the Victim of your life or the Owner? 

In the past few years (ahem, COVID) there have been a lot of things inflicted on us that were out of our control. We had to wear masks. We had to stay at home. We dealt with supply chain issues. We’ve seen the economy struggle and prices rise. We've had to face all these things that were imposed on us, things we wouldn’t have chosen for ourselves. And when those things happen, as a human you tend to get into a victim mindset that isn’t easy to get out of.  

Signs you’re in a victim mindset 

• “Have to” (victim) vs. “Want to” or “Choose to” (owner) 
• “Pleasing” (victim) vs. “Serving” (owner) 
• “Interested” (victim) vs. “Committed” (owner) 
• "Hanging in there"

It’s okay that you go there, just don’t stay there   

The most important point to me was everyone goes through this - that mindset is a choice, but that doesn’t mean your mindset is always perfect. It won’t be. And, you can choose to remind yourself, I do have things I can control. I do have things I can change. 

I like that reminder that yes, I'm going to be in that mode at some point in my life, but I can make changes. I can choose to be different. 

How to shift from victim to ownership mindset 

Todd’s presentation gave us a lot to think about, but it wasn't anything like with a typical speaker where you listen and you go, that's great, you feel good for a minute and then you put it in your file drawer. Instead, we took away simple, actionable tools and resources that you can use at work and at home. 

The biggest tool my team took away is awareness: recognizing when those victim words come out of your mouth. “Have to” is a big one. “Hanging in there” is another one. Anything that sounds like you’re suffering through your circumstances instead of building your best life.  

Once you're paying attention you might be surprised how often you say things like that. You start to notice all those moments and think, dang it. Okay. I'm in it. So what can I do?  

That recognition light bulb is the first step 

Once you recognize the behavior and the words, the power is back in your hands. You have a choice right then and there. You can choose to continue down that path, or you can choose not to. What's going to work best for you? What's going to work best for your friends, your family, your team? Probably not the victim mindset.  

Sharing the message is good leadership 

It’s essential to share these tools with your team, not just leadership but everyone. Having that connection with more of your teammates, hearing that same information, gives you a reminder.  

They can help catch you when you’re starting to go down that path . . . Oh, Tracy, you sound a little like you're in a victim mindset. Let's talk about that a little bit. How could you own your choices and accountability? Remember when we heard that information? What could you do?  

When we're in those situations, if we can help each other, support each other, or help ourselves through it, we get to that place of making good decisions for the future we want to create together. 

Leaders have a responsibility to their team to help them with any tool or resource they can put their hands on. It's our responsibility to bring those to the team and allow each person to take the best pieces for them out of it. This is one more opportunity where we can do that. 

I highly encourage you to learn more about Todd Musselman here.